The Iowa Caucus: Random Thoughts...

Mitt Romney: He might win but I hope he doesn’t because then we’re in for crushing boredom for months. I always like to follow the money and Mitt’s got the moolah. He’s still my pick for the GOP nominee because he looks like a senior citizen Ken doll.

Newt Gingrich: Always thought The Newt was the sharpest of the bunch, but I’m wondering if he won’t be crushed by all the baggage he’s carrying: the treatment of his former wives, the censure and fines imposed upon him by a Republican House, and collecting millions for “history lessons” with Freddie Mac. He’s also been bloodied by the negative attack ads fired from the pro-Romney camp. Here’s hoping he shows better than fifth for no other reason than the entertainment value he’ll provide.

Rick Santorum: If he wins or even comes second/third the media might actually have to pay him some attention. Rick’s in tough because he hasn’t got a whole lot of money. If he’s judged a “serious candidate” by a possibly good showing, the attack ads will begin.

Ron Paul: I like Ronny because he’s almost as cranky as I am. I also like some of his ideas even though they’re a bit out there. What’s wrong with bringing all the troops home, eliminating the IRS and abolishing the income tax? Too much racist and homophobic baggage here, too, I’m afraid. He doesn’t have a chance in New Hampshire and even the GOP establishment is horrified by his foreign policy. Best he could do tonight is second. Paul's poor chances at a GOP nomination are unfortunate because he's the closest thing America has to a third party.

Rick Perry: The debates hurt this guy, big time. He seems lost outside of Texas. The national stage has been less than kind. I think the voters have decided he’s not ready for the presidency and his donations have been reduced to a trickle.

Michele O’Bachmann (that’s what Letterman insists on calling her): She’s lost her Iowa chairman to the Paul camp. She’s running bare-bones and she stuck too long with some of her goofy positions like the cancer vaccine causing mental retardation issue. She’ll have a poor showing in Iowa since they’ve never endorsed a woman candidate or sent one to the governor’s mansion. She’ll have her hands full just saving her House seat in Minnesota.

Jon Huntsman: He’s looking at New Hampshire instead of Iowa already and says he’s putting some of his own money there. This guy has received all kinds of positive spin from the pundits but for some reason he’s never connected with the voters. I predict he won’t break out of single digits in N.H. and will be history.